This is my collection of signature quotes, updated January 8, 2012.
They change as often as I change my mind; I find new ones all the
time, especially from the mailing list "A Word A Day" (I recommend it
For those who don't know the term, a signature quote is a
that can fit on one or two lines, so you can add it to the end of
I don't recommend browsing the whole thing at once; sensory overload can
steal the enjoyment of such things.
Galina Miklosic has translated these into belorussian at this site
If you chase two rabbits, you will lose them both.
You can't control the wind, but you can
adjust your sails.
Change is inevitable;
progress is optional.
Man is harder than iron, stronger than
more fragile than a rose.
If triangles had a God, he'd have 3 sides.
Women who seek to be equal to men lack
The man who claims to be the boss in his
own home will
lie about other things as well.
Getting old is wonderful, when you
Only when you can be extremely pliable and
soft can you be
extremely hard and strong.
Stupid questions are better than stupid
Even a blind hog finds an acorn every now
The meek shall inherit the earth.
The rest of us will go to the stars.
If you add a cup of wine to a barrel of sewage, you get a barrel of
If you add a cup of sewage to a barrel of wine,
you get a barrel of sewage.
Do not attribute any action to malice that
explained by stupidity.
To talk goodness is not good. Only to do
Only a fool tests the depth of the water
with both feet.
Zen, Taoist and Philosophical quotes
The deer hunter does not notice the mountains.
The superior person uses his mind like a
mirror: it accepts all, it reflects all. It recieves, but it does not
We cannot be more sensitive to pleasure
more sensitive to pain.
The Web site you seek
cannot be located.
But endless others exist.
The Tao that is seen
is not the true Tao, until
you bring fresh toner.
Stay the patient course.
Of little worth is your ire;
the network is down.
Why not seize the pleasure at once? How often is happiness
destroyed by preparation, foolish preparation!
If you can get nothing better out of the
world, get a good dinner out of it, at least.
Herman Melville (in Moby Dick)
If you must argue, remember that it is
impossible to defeat
an ignorant man in argument.
William Gibbs McAdoo
Trust your own instinct. Your mistakes
might as well be
your own, instead of someone else's.
In the world, there is nothing more
submissive and weak than
water. Yet for attacking that which is hard and strong,
nothing can surpass it.
Take your life in your own hands, and what
terrible thing: no one to blame.
All our words are but crumbs that fall
down from the
feast of the mind.
Man is most nearly himself when he
seriousness of a child at play.
The only real voyage of discovery consists
not in seeking
new landscapes but in having new eyes.
Not one shred of evidence exists in favor
of the idea
that life is serious.
I don't mind going nowhere, as long as
an interesting path.
If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss
Blessed is he who expects nothing;
for he shall not be disappointed.
Happiness is the absence of the striving
Silence is one of the most effective forms
The nice thing about having nothing is
that you don't
have to worry about losing it.
A man said to the Universe, "Sir, I exist!".
"However," replied the Universe,
"The fact has not aroused in me
a sense of obligation".
I'll tell you the meaning of life, but first you have to promise not to
"Frank & Earnest"
This above all: to your own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
Reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated.
In answer to the question of why it
happened, I offer the modest proposal that our Universe is simply
one of those things which happen from time to time.
Edward P. Tryon
The only difference between me and a
that I am not mad.
Warning: dates on calendar are
closer than they appear.
Whatever you do may seem insignificant,
it is most important that you do it.
Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in
That way, if he gets angry, he's a mile away and barefoot.
Resistentialism: (N) the perceived
tendency of inanimate
objects to be obstinate. E.g. the toaster that won't pop
up, the spring clip that keeps jumping out on the floor.
from "The Spizzerinctum Archive"
It's better to give than to receive.
Contrary to popular opinion, the plural of
'anecdote' is not 'fact'.
This space intentionally left blank.
We can seldom get our children to do what
we tell them, but they almost never fail to imitate us.
There is hopeful symbolism in the fact
flags do not wave in a vacuum.
Arthur C. Clarke
If I were punished for every pun I shed,
there would not be left a puny shed of my punnish head.
The box said "Requires Windows 95, NT, or
I installed Linux.
Thousands of years ago, cats were
worshipped as Gods.
Cats have never forgotten this.
Worry is like a rocking chair - it gives
you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere.
I always wanted to be somebody, but I
been more specific.
The law, in its majestic equality, forbids
as well as the poor to sleep under bridges, to beg
in the streets, and to steal bread.
Welcome to Hell. Here's your copy of
It is better to suffer wrong than to do
happier to be sometimes cheated than not to trust.
A town that cannot support a lawyer can
always support two.
Nine in the second place means: The yellow
bird approaches the malt shop. Misfortune.
I think it would be a good idea.
Mahatma Ghandi, when asked by a reporter for his opinion of western
Any sufficiently advanced technology is
indistinguishable from a rigged demo.
At Group L, Stoffel oversees six
programmers, a managerial challenge roughly
comparable to herding cats.
Washington Post Magazine,6/9/85
Nails are better wood fasteners than
if both are applied using a hammer.
Death is nature's way of telling you to
I was delighted to be able to answer
"I don't know", I said.
3rd law of thermodynamics: things go
worse under pressure.
Things should be made as simple as
possible, and not simpler.
When I was a boy I was told that anybody
could become President. Now I'm beginning
to believe it.
Keep away from people who try to belittle
Small people always do that, but the really great make
you feel that you, too, can become great.
Live as you will wish to have lived when
you are dying.
Christian F. Gellert
Be the change you want to see in the
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
Mohandas K Ghandi
Contrary to popular belief, Barnum's great
discovery was not how easy it was to deceive the public, but rather,
how much the public enjoyed being deceived.
Daniel J. Boorstin
Since when do you have to agree with
people to defend
them from injustice?
Computers are about making life easier in much the same way that the Republican party is about fiscal responsibility and a culture of life.
The best thing about the future is that it
one day at a time.
Beware of 'the real world'. A speaker's appeal to it is alway an invitation not to challenge his tacit assumptions.
If I had eight hours to chop down a tree,
six sharpening my axe.
Failure is not an option. It is a
only for those who try.
Indifference is evil's bodyguard. Without
it, evil would
have to do a much better job of hiding.
Isn't sanity just a one-trick pony anyway?
I mean, all you
get is that one trick, rational thinking, but when you're
good and crazy, well, the sky's the limit!
"The Tick (comic book)"
Wise sayings often fall on barren ground;
but a kind word is never thrown away.
-Arthur Helps (1813-1875)
Computers are useless. They only give answers.
Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
George Bernard Shaw
Always do right; this will gratify some
people and astonish the rest.
He who allows oppression, shares the
-Erasmus Darwin, grandfather of Charles Darwin
It is not so much our friends' help that
helps us, as the
confident knowledge that they will help us.
Don't surrender your loneliness
Let it cut more deeply.
Let it ferment and season you
As few human
Or even divine ingredients can.
The woods would be very silent if only the
birds with the
sweetest songs were heard.
An unhurried sense of time is, in itself, a
form of wealth.
(Seen in a self-service gas pump display)
... because computers are happiest when we
describing them in anthropomorphic terms.
(from the preface of an O'Rielly book)
"Men", said the Devil,
"Are kind to their brothers."
"They don't want to mend
their own ways, but each other's."
Heisenberg may have slept here.
Do not be fanatical in your dedication to
Anne Rice, "Pandora"
Drawing on my fine command of language,
I said nothing.
If you are irritated by every rub, how will you be polished?
Never be afraid to try something new.
built the ark, and professionals built the Titanic.
My Own Sayings
If it was easy, everybody would
be doing it.
Humans are the only creatures that
Sure, dreams can come true. Just ask ask any kid that recently wet the bed.
Knowledge is often mistaken for
intelligence. This is like mistaking a cup of milk for a cow.
If you wish to convince people of
something, it is
more useful to be entertaining than to be right.
Greatness is difficult to appreciate from
The great mountain on the horizon is only the ground when you are
standing on it.
Surely thou jivest...
A major source of conflict in the world is
misconception that words can be true or false.
Actually, there is such a thing as a free
just that few of us are rich enough to get to see it.
There are a lot of judgemental people in
and I think all those people are worthless dirtballs.
The trouble with doing something right the
first time is
that nobody appreciates how difficult it is.
To affirm that every person has inherent
dignity is an understatement as great as saying that
Bill Gates has some money.
There is much that cannot be understood by
soul that thinks words are the same as thoughts.
If you never fail, you're not
trying hard enough.
**> Never let a computer see you
Much trouble in the world has been caused
by the belief
that words are the same as thoughts. In fact, the one
who hears them supplies their only truth or falsity.
A sure way to drain life of its savor is
to keep a death-grip on it.
The only thing with no end is the present.